Sunday, Funday, Sunday, Funday, Money

Sunday is a great day. If I ever feel upset, I always pretend it's Sunday. I sometimes even trick Staz into thinking it's Sunday when it isn't, to cheer her up for about ten seconds until she realizes I'm a horrible liar and ultimately have made her feel worse. I kick back with the blinds open, and all the lights on, cause today I am the King, and I'm wearing my pants, and you cant catch me, and so on. Although I guess I'll be paying for it eventually: dearer electricity bills, and, in the long term, a better tan, but who cares, it is SUNDAY.


The only rubbish thing is that it's not a banking day. I've just managed to make £300 by selling various stuff and playing online bingo, but it's taking a good while to fall into my account. I hate waiting around for money. Other normal countries don't take 5 odd days to move numbers, but Britain still pretends that it aint got no computers, and it's all done on horseback and wax sealed and stuff. And so, after being poor for so long, I'll buy loads of stuff as soon as I get hold of it, and be poor five days later. Cue desperate attempts to rationalize wild expenditure, usually resulting in gross exaggeration of what was necessary spending, and what was not. My head goes something like this:


"So, you spent £300 in five days again. That's bad. Pretty bad. Oh! But there was that bill that had to be paid, and the important book you will never get round to reading. Yeah, the book was what, 15, but we'll call it £50 to save us some paperwork, and the bill...yeah, like, we'll call it £100. So. That's half of the money spent on useful shit! See! You're not a moron!"


But the good part of my brain knows what is true. I am a moron.


Oh, but I did win £50 of the money on bingo, by signing up for a £5 bonus, and then owning the (online) bingo hall. So that can be justifiably spent on complete nonsense.


Look, I'm doing it again, and I don't even have the money yet.


Jesus, help me, please. Get me on one of those tv shows where they go through your spending habits and tell you off.




(I think the people are knocking on the floor to make me turn my not very loud music down. Oh, now they are having an argument.)

edit: (ha ha, they are knocking on the floor. I hadn't visualized that until now. They are on their knees, or lying down, hitting the floor. excellent)